#21: Three things that got me thinking

Routine + writerly trick + deep cleaning

1. Routine

A decade ago, my beloved and I finally got to live in the same country, after a long time apart at the start of our relationship. Finally, we could do all the ordinary things together. Like filling up a supermarket cart together!

I remember thinking: That’s what I craved, ROUTINE. Falling into a natural rhythm, instead of the highs and lows of scrambling together enough cash for a Ryanair flight in between weeks of urgent, nightly Google Chats.

I remember thinking: Routine is not the enemy of love, it’s where love resides! That’s how grandiose it felt to me.

I wondered then if I would ever take it for granted, and of course I do now.

Not this week, though.

We’re sick and it sucks. It’s also mild enough, and I feel grateful that we have each other, social security, flexible jobs, a fully-stocked fridge, and a sense of humour.

So far, being stuck at home with the kids is a treat and we’ve had fun. (Ask me again in a few days.)

Our days are structured loosely around meals and naps. We lower the pressure on ourselves and have permission to let aside external goals and timetables that usually make us rush rush rush. We rediscover neglected toys. We rest. We make even more time for cuddles. We embrace ordinary, repetitive things.

We rock the simplified routine, because it’s ours.

2. Getting started

Last month, I came across this trick to beat writer’s block from writer Kelly Eden, through her Substack newsletter Because You Write:

“Just keep your hand moving, even if you write: ‘blah, blah, this is awful and I don’t know what to write.’ Just keep going. Eventually, something will come.”

It works!

It reminds me of my drama teacher in college, who offered a similar method to get a natural laugh on stage. Just do a stupid, ridiculous, fake laugh, she offered. A snort, a giggle, whatever: that will soon make you laugh for real.

(Also, being sick made it painful to stare at the screen for too long, and I discovered it’s an efficient way to speed up my writing and curb my self-editing tendencies. #writelikeyoureyeshurt)

3. Deep cleaning

We’ve cleaned parts of the flat, changed our germ-ridden bedsheets, and marvelled at how pleasant it all felt afterwards (and how our 5-year-old enjoyed cleaning with us, too). It made me think of all the times that we deep cleaned apartments at the end of a lease: fresh silicone seals in the bathroom, clean curtains, immaculate kitchen drawers, etc. etc.

Haha, it wasn’t so bad, we should have done this when we actually lived here! we joked.

Why didn’t we? How sad is it that we do this for a landlord inspection or the next tenants, but can’t get motivated to do it for our worthy selves? #cleanlikeyourowneriscoming